Brittany christmas, gingerbread and mice, aka The traps of wrath

Christmas has started early this year, as we're combining our summer holiday with Christmas. Why leave your home town in the best part of the year? Why go elsewhere when there's so many summer events at home? Abandon the damp and dark at midwinter, head for the Med. Well, we've gone a little off course and ended up booking a gite in Brittany, but at least it's a fair bit further south, and we will be warmed by the gulf stream (ho ho ho).

Time for the only Breton themed joke I know.

"Excuse me Breton chappie, what do you call this quaint religious procession?"

"Pardon, monsieur."

"I said, what do you call this quaint religious procession?".......

Meanwhile, right now we're busy at home, getting ahead on some of the things the rest of you will be doing over the next three weeks. The local garden centre had this fantastic fairy tale display, hence my opportunity to cuddle up with a five foot gingerbread man. (I'm the one on the right.) I'm full of christmas cheer, and goodwill to all, except the mice.

Spurs have won 9-1 against Wigan recently. Well I've been in a series of 0-0 draws with the mice, probably as the opposition has not bothered to turn up. But over the last 24 hours they have got through three mousetrap loads of chocolate, with no success at all on my part. So it's Mice 15 pieces of chocolate, Big Swifty nil. Can I ever come back from this 15-0 thrashing? All I have done is make the mice welcome. I reckon my game plan should be to hope the mice collapse from heart disease, as they won't be caught by the spring traps, unlike my knuckles. I've put another five pieces of choccy out tonight, and take solace from Wigan's 1-0 win in their subsequent match - it is possible to make a comeback.......